Three Steps to Food Happiness
Do you find yourself claiming that you’re just not disciplined enough to eat what you should? Do you consider eating a monotonous task just to stay alive? Is meal planning another arduous chore that moves to the end of your list each week - maybe even skipped? Our relationship with food can be healed and can be happy with three steps.
“Happiness is when what you think, what you say, and what you do are in harmony.”
Gandhi’s words are simple in theory and challenging in practice. Think about it: how often do you find yourself thinking about doing something and then NOT doing it. Or have a friend that agrees to help you with a task and then they back out last minute when you were counting on them. When our thoughts, words, and actions are not in alignment, we can lose trust and question character.
When it comes to food, you might find yourself thinking about making a healthy habit change such as reducing fast food intake or cutting out sugary beverages. You might even tell your friends about it. But then hunger hits, convenience calls, and cravings pop up. The result? Actions fail to align with cognitive and verbal plans. And after that? Likely a pattern of shame, guilt, and self-reprimanding, with an ultimate dictator-like decision to “suck it up and do better.”
But if this worked, we wouldn’t be here.
So how can we approach our relationships with food in a way that promotes positive results, enjoyable habits, and food happiness? It starts with our thoughts.
Step 1: Positive, loving self-talk
The root of all action is how we talk to ourselves. Start by acknowledging that you are unconditionally worthy of health, love, and happiness despite any external factor. If we truly love ourselves and believe we are worthy of all the love and happiness in the world just as much as anyone else in our lives are worthy of it, big things can change.
A great place to start is by first noticing what you say to yourself, especially in challenging or failing situations. You might find that phrases like “I’m such a screw up” or “I’m a fat pig” are fairly common. Write these down. They won’t survive being exposed and challenged with empathy. Would you ever say this to someone like your best friend or your child? Likely not, so why say it to yourself?
Once you write it down, edit the phrase to come from a place of positivity and love. “I’m such a screw up” might become “I didn’t succeed as I hoped this time around” and “I’m a fat pig” might become “I have some changes I’d like to make to feel better in my body.” These thoughts are empathetic, forgiving, and open the door to healing actions.
Step 2: Advocate for yourself
Once you have a positive internal foundation, then you need to be your own biggest advocate for yourself. Truly believing that you are worthy of good health means that you are worthy of putting yourself first and having the time to engage in healthy habits. Block off time for exercise or meal planning or winding down for bed and keep those time blocks as rigid and important as any other appointment. You’re worth it, remember? This is time for you.
When faced with the option of changing course, you can explain that it isn’t an option because you have a commitment to yourself and plan to keep it. Eating fast food with your friends instead of eating the healthy leftovers you have prepared at home would break the plans you made for staying on your positive path. Of course that doesn’t mean you can’t hang out with your friends, and it doesn’t mean that you can NEVER eat certain foods! It’s all about the way you talk to yourself and the plans you make. Use phrases such as “I don’t eat...” or “It is not in my best interest right now to…” instead of “I can’t eat…” or “I shouldn’t eat…” and connect back to your goals and worth.
Try making a list of ways that you might make changes to advocate for yourself to keep your commitment to your health that you are worthy of achieving.
Step 3: Take action
Remember your self-talk and advocacy, and follow through on plans, as big or small as they may be. You might find that trying to cook new healthy recipes as a family is more enjoyable than eating take out in front of the TV. You might find that nobody was really offended when you weren’t available at your desk for the lunch hour because you took a break to exercise. You might find that you are able to show up better for others because you’re more refreshed after prioritizing your sleep schedule.
Whatever it is, stick to it because you are worth it. Keep track of the changes through journaling, occasional measures, or feedback from others. And when slip ups happen (and they will, because we’re human) keep kind thoughts flowing. Think of what you’d say to your best friend and approach the situation with curiosity and love so that you can adjust course in a positive way. Shame and negativity have no place in successful healthy habit development. And YOU are the only one who can do the work to reject shame!
Break the cycle so that kind thoughts become committed words that become recurring actions. This is where you’ll find food happiness.
Are you interested in mindful eating strategies, intuitive eating principles, or general nutrition coaching to help meet your goal of healthy living and food happiness?
Send me a message to chat about it!
Cheers & Namaste!
Jess